2 Years Ago, My Life's Direction Changed

Today, May 24^th, is a bittersweet day.

The former location of The Controlled Burn Fitness Studio
www.ControlledBurnFitness.com

Today marks the day that 2 Years Ago, the direction of my life changed.

May 24th, 2011

Within hours of waking up on the morning of May 24^th, 2011, I went from being a proud business owner and successful health and fitness professional, to making the decision to become a full time student.

On May 24^th, 2011, I woke up at 5:15am, excited that I'd slept in past 4am on my day off. I had planned on spending the day enjoying an early morning hike along the Morro Ridge Trail in Crystal Cove State Park followed by some quality time with my kayak in Newport Bay.

I checked my phone to see what time it was, and noticed I had missed a couple of phone calls and messages. Turns out, these calls and messages were from the Glendale Police Department and Glendale Fire Department, informing me “about an incident at my business…”  (Feel free to read the entire story HERE).

Fast forward a few hours, around noon. Sitting in the remnants of my fire-stinking, charred fitness studio, I had made the decision to go back to college, thanks to Joanne DiVito from Career Transition for Dancers.

In the two years since the fire, I have completed all but one of the required Core Curriculum Classes in the Saint Mary’s College of California LEAP Program, along with writing papers on American Sub Cultures, The Care and Prevention of Athletic Injuries, and Small Business management; each of which earned 3 Upper Division Units that I didn’t have to pay for!!! J

This past Monday was the first day of my last in-person Core Curriculum Classes, World Traditions. I now only have to complete an internship and senior project in the fall along with a Dance Teaching Methodology Course at Glendale Community College to earn my AA/Dance Teaching Certificate along with my BA from Saint Mary’s!

Whew, cramming 4 years worth of work in 2 years and one more semester has been hard, but very rewarding work.

I couldn’t have done any of this without the emotional and financial support of my amazing husband, the encouragement from Miss Tina Heinz, and the guidance and incredible mentorship of Dora Krannig. I also must thank Mister Lynn McMurrey for planting the seeds over 20 years ago, that dancers are far more capable than we are aware of, of achieving amazing things.

As much as I sometimes wish my beautiful little fitness studio was still standing, and that I was taking care of my amazing clients, I wouldn’t trade this 2 year detour for anything.

Happy 2 Year Anniversary of the Goodbye to The Controlled Burn Fitness Studio.

One more semester and I’ll be back to taking care athletes, dancers, and fitness enthusiasts who want to attain and maintain healthy, balanced, and functional bodies!
J

Wishing Ya’ll a Happy and Healthy Day!

-Melissa Adylia Calasanz

Of
Controlled Burn Fitness

J

Saint Mary's College of California LEAP Program Dance History 1 Presentation with Video: Classical & Romantic Ballet.

Dance History 1

Presentation

Romantic and Classical Ballet

Carlotta Grissi as Giselle (1841)

This semester, I am taking Dance History 1. Each week, 2 students are responsible for presenting/leading a seminar-style discussion about the assigned reading and tying it into a current internet/blog story that corresponds to the assigned reading.

The article, "A Ballet Romance" byTobi Tobias, from Arts Journal was the inspiration for the points I chose to focus on in order to open up discussion for further exploration:

1. How has romantic ballet changed over the years?

2. How will understanding ballet's past help to preserve and progress ballet's artistry?

As a former professional dancer and performer, I am comfortable with being in front of an audience. Public speaking is never a problem. I've presented many workshops on health and fitness without any stress. I teach group fitness classes to rooms full of people, and lead runner's warm up before big events with no problem.

This evening was especially stressful due to the fact that I was presenting in front of a group of my peers, each who has also enjoyed successful careers as professional dancers; several as ballet dancers with prestigious ballet companies.

I thought it would be helpful to record my presentation in order to see how I do while presenting "out of my element." Here's the first half of my presentation (about 29 minutes). My camera will only record that long before automatically shutting off and I'd forgotten about it.

Whew, I'm glad that's over! Give me an audience of several thousand strangers any day! Facing my peers...eeek! It was as uncomfortable as being asked to let my classmates watch me take a shower.

It's so frustrating to hear myself saying "um," "and again," "kind of," "and all that stuff," so many times...uggg, such a confession to insecurity. 

Even though this was by far one of the most stressful presentations I have ever done, I am proud of what I had done. A great lesson for future presentations. Overall, I think I did an OK job considering my "performance-in-front-of-my-peers-anxiety."

Melissa Adylia Calasanz

Dance History 1

LEAP Program

(Liberal Education for Arts Professionals)

Saint Mary's College of California

Los Angeles Group

End of Summer School Celebratory Dinner

End of Summer-Semester Celebratory Dinner

All the veggies prepped!
at Chez Calasanz

I really love cooking dinner.
I especially love sitting across the table from my husband while enjoying a home cooked meal.
I had not had the opportunity to prepare one sit-down meal during my summer semester. 

I was so involved with reading 12 books in 2 months, along with writing interpretive and comparative essays, that I decided it was best to prep all our meals ahead of time.
It was more practical to have ACs dinners waiting for him in the fridge when he got home since I was not returning from the library til usually after 9pm.
To celebrate the end of the semester, Mister AC picked up a bottle of bubbly as I prepared dinner.

Shrimp!

Shrimp is ready for cooking!at Chez Calasanz 

Getting plates ready to accept the bounty!
at Chez Calasanz

Mmm, I love fresh and colorful veggies!
Mandolined raw golden beets, heirloom carrots and cucumbers
at Chez Calasanz
:)

Fresh and colorful veggies with a blend of brown and wild rices and mung beans, along with mandolined raw golden beets, heirloom carrots and cucumbers.at Chez Calasanz
:)

Dinner is served!at Chez Calasanz
:)
Spicy shrimp (garlic, ginger, shallots, chives, green onion, and chili flakes)
served with
Fresh and colorful veggies with a blend of brown and wild rices and mung beans, along with mandolined raw golden beets, heirloom carrots and cucumbers.
:)

My favorite view while eating dinner: My wonderful man enjoying his mealI love cooking dinner for this wonderful man!
Thankfully, he enjoys eating my cooking.
:)at Chez Calasanz

Time to eat!
:)
Spicy shrimp (garlic, ginger, shallots, chives, green onion, and chili flakes)
served with
Fresh and colorful veggies with a blend of brown and wild rices and mung beans, along with mandolined raw golden beets, heirloom carrots and cucumbers.
-Melissa Adylia Calasanz
Chez Calasanz

Hydration is essential!at Chez Calasanz
:)
Look closely and you can see Mister AC snagging some more shrimp!

It was such a treat to cook such a colorful, healthy, and delicious meal.

The best part was finally enjoying a meal and bubbly with my wonderful husband.

It was so nice to sit across from him and chat about life and shenanigans. 

:)

Whew! Summer School is over!

Critical Perspectives

Monday, August 20^th, marked the last day of Summer School!

It also marked the day I turned in my final paper for CP1.

:)

Required reading for CP1
Critical Perspectives (CP1) is one of the required courses in the
LEAP Program Core Curriculum

CP1, also known as Critical Perspectives

is one of the required courses in the

Saint Mary's College LEAP Program Core Curriculum.

From the Saint Marys College of California Website:

 “SEM 109 - Critical Perspectives I

An exploration of great writings that have shaped Western culture, including The Epic of Gilgamesh, and works by Dante, Chaucer, Blake, Melville, Plato, Shakespeare, Sophocles, Thoreau, Morrison, Cather and Stoppard. Students reflect critically upon important ideas and learn to cultivate habits of careful and disciplined reading.”

From June 4^th-August 13^th, the class met 7 times, for a 4 hour class at a hotel in Little Tokyo, in Downtown Los Angeles. The class was required to read 12 books, write interpretive essays, and complete a final comparative essay by August 20^th.

Wow, it was a challenge!

Just look at the picture above and you’ll see the books we read for class.

Not exactly what one would consider “light” summer reading.

If it weren’t for the wonderful professor who always managed to keep me entertained, I sure don't know how I would have survived all the reading and essay writing.

Snack time at the Newport Beach Public Library
Taking a break from working on the final Comparative Essay

Though I thoroughly enjoyed the in-class discussion with my professor and amazing classmates, I wasn't too thrilled to learn that I am completely lacking in the type of hypothetical thinking required to successfully write interpretive essays.
I am now completely aware that my organizational skills completely fly off the wheel when attempting to compose a coherent interpretive essay...uggg!
It’s as if the hamster in my head gets to spinning out of control on his wheel thanks to all my ideas, then gets his fuzzy little foot stuck in the wheel and just keeps flying around with the wheel with no way to stop. 

Tackling those interpretive essays was definitely not my cup o’ tea!

Every day at the library, during CP1, was like Groundhogs Day

I am proud that I stuck it out, worked hard, and did my best. Sadly, my best really pretty much sucked. I only got one B on a paper, the rest Cs, and one C-! 

The professor was an honest grader. 

The bad grades were all me.

:/

I am really looking forward to the next 2 weeks, where I will enjoy a lot of kayaking, hiking, running, cooking, and sleeping, along with picking up a book and reading it for pure enjoyment.

Cheers to the rest of summer!

M

:)

I'm So Proud!!!

WOW!

I'm LOVING School!!!

I’m Super PROUD!!!

Just found out I was awarded 3 UD UNITS for the paper I wrote on American Subcultures!!!

From the fantastic director of the LEAP program

Hooray! More great news for Melissa! Congrats to you and Miri.

Also, Melissa, this essay will meet one of your Area C requirements!

Great work!

Best,

~mb

From the Evaluator

3 UD UNITS - American Subcultures

I was impressed with your well-written and respectful critical analysis of the foot fetish subculture…You discussed numerous variations in the expression of foot fetishes, beginning with the centuries-old tradition of foot-binding in China, and extending to aggressive, physically intense activities such as trampling and kicking. As to foot-binding in particular, you drew parallels between this now discontinued Chinese practice and the contemporary custom of wearing stiletto heels and pointe shoes in their comparable appeal within the foot fetish subculture. You wrote at length about the diverse range of men and women who make up the foot fetish subculture in contemporary American society, many of whom are bright, well-educated, and occupy positions of respect and influence in the work world and society at large. You also noted that the frequently submissive behaviors individuals elicit within the foot fetish subculture are often not emblematic of the sense of self they hold and present more authentically in other life domains. You added that because these individuals are predominantly reluctant to disclose their foot fetish preferences and interests in their public and personal lives, they especially enjoy and value the ability to realize their intimate fantasies in the accepting climate accorded to them in private, well-organized, and largely non-sexual events… Moreover, you remarked that many of the male and female participants in attendance at such gatherings find intrinsic enjoyment and satisfaction in sharing various foot fetish activities, and do so with mutual regard. You qualified that a segment of the foot fetish subculture, however, is comprised of professionals from the adult entertainment world who, by contrast, have little respect for the unique desires of the individuals they encounter, and for whom there is little personal meaning in fulfilling others' foot-related fantasies beyond the purely extrinsic rewards these activities provide. I was privileged to share in your fascinating and insightful personal story.

You have earned three upper division units for the learning documented by your exemplary essay.

Respectfully,

Thomas O. Hodgson, Ph.D.

I cannot thank my professor, Miri Hunter, enough!!!

The guidance I received from Miri, while writing the papers for the LEAP 100-Personal and Professional Assessment Course (PPA) last semester, was unbelievable.

She is an amazing educator who has the patience and the wisdom to help facilitate clear thinking, and knows how to deliver the tools needed for us to navigate the process of writing about such challenging topics.

Miri’s guidance was my greatest assets as I tackled these papers!

J

So far:

2 out of 4 papers have been evaluated.

Kinesiology: The Care and Prevention of Injuries

3 Upper Division Units on the 1^st try!!!

Sociology-American Subcultures: Foot Fetish Subcultures

3 Upper Division Units on the 1^st try!!!

Sweet!

I’m LOVING the LEAP Program

Adventures in Math

Week 1 Recap of Math 10

Saint Mary’s of California

LEAP Program

First of all, ya gotta love a class with a text book named

Succeed with Math: Every Student's Guide to Conquering Math Anxiety

Just like a good trail run, I may not get things done as fast as everyone else, but I will embrace my weakness, celebrate my strengths, learn things along the way, and enjoy the journey as I tackle my

First Math class since 1988!

Over the years, I have come to love the thrill of embracing a challenge. Physical challenges have become something I seek, and thrive off of. I have experienced, survived, and have learned from many emotional experiences. However, academic challenges have always proven to be the most intimidating to me...especially Math.

I was really NOT looking forward to spending 4 hours each week for 10 weeks being reminded what it feels like to NOT be very good at something.

With the way I was dreading having to attempt Math at a collegiate level, no one would believe I was once considered an AP (Advanced Placement) Math Student.

I’m not entirely sure if an AP Math Class is where I was supposed to be, but I had placed in the 90-95 percentile for Math on my CAP tests (California Aptitude Test) before entering junior high.  I am not sure if they still do these tests, but back-in-the-day we all had to take the tests and the tests determined the type of classes/levels we would take. So, as I entered 7^th Grade, I was officially and AP Student in Math, English, and Science.

I had started out doing very well in the AP Math Classes, but by the time we got to Algebra I was a very sick kid. I had missed 84 school days that year due to bronchitis, pneumonia, strep, scarlet fever, and sinus infections.

Hmm, amazing I didn’t get scurvy, rickets, or the plague!

Missing so much of the in-class instruction made it impossible for me to keep up with the class. Interestingly, I was able to ace all my AP English and Science classes during that time. Sadly, I failed my first attempt at AP Algebra in the 7th grade so I had to take AP Algebra again in 8^th grade...and on the second attempt, I got a D+.

L

So I had to take Algebra again in 9^th grade.

Algebra for the 3^rd time! I was humiliated.

L

 All my “smart” friends were now taking Trig in 9^th grade. I not only had to re-do math, I was going to be placed in the “stupid kids” Algebra class. Ya know, a non-AP class.

I’m not entirely sure why math just didn’t translate from a book to my brain back in those days, but after last night’s class, I realized that if I am guided through the process and DO the process while attending to continuity, I can almost feel comfortable with basic problems.

I liken it to following a baking recipe or executing proper ballet technique before progressing to other forms of dance...if you do not have the absolute basics, things fall apart when you try to progress faster or father than poor/inadequate training will support.

This class is covering pretty much everything I never learned or don’t remember

Week 1:          Exponents and Order of operations.

Week 2:          Fractions.

Week 3:          Ratios, Proportions, and Percent.

Week 4:          Algebra.

Week 5:          More Algebra.

Week 6:          More Algebra and Graphing Lines.

Week 7:          More Graphing Lines and Trigonometry.

Week 8:          Statistics.

Week 9:          More Statistics.

Week 10:       Our Final Exam!

Each class is a little over 4 hours long on Monday nights.

We meet in Little Tokyo in DTLA from 6:30-10:30pm.
The professor totally understands us freaked-out dancers.
Most of us have not done math in at least 20 years!

He is really patient, and it’s totally obvious that he really does want us to "get it."

The 4 hours actually went by really fast.

Looking forward to next week!

J

 

Everybody's Doing It!

11/18/11

Writing ELPs are great because…

They’re cool!  Units! Everybody’s doing it! A reason to go to the library!

Seriously; writing ELPs are great because the process has been both personally and professionally rewarding. The ELP writing process has proven I do know more than I know, it gives me the opportunity to get some much desired academic credit, and I’ve now begun to read articles in magazines, texts, and newspapers with a whole new perspective. J

As “cool” as writing the ELPs has been, the process has been like expecting my brain to run a 2^nd marathon while doing 90 second planks every 3 miles. I’ve written papers before, I’ve run several marathons, I do planks all the time, and I’ve spent plenty of time thinking about  my life, but if someone expected me to go and run a marathon while throwing in some planks, without proper training,  I know I wouldn’t be a success. However, if there happened to be a college for “brain-planking-marathons” I’d sign up, take the course, and kick some “brain-planking-marathon” bootay!

As fun as a “brain-planking-marathon” sounds, I am sure it would be about as “fun” as the ELP writing process has been…not exactly fun, but definitely rewarding! Now that the finish line is in sight, and my brain is finally realizing that all the hard work and trust in the process is paying off, I’m beginning to realize:

I CAN do it!

Though writing the ELPs has been challenging, the process has been reflective, enlightening, humbling, and helpful for what I intend to be doing professionally in the future. The process has helped me hone much needed organizational skills for conveying information and putting my ideas into focus, along with affording me a lesson in time efficiency.  

Another enjoyable, yet totally unexpected, side effect of the ELP writing process is I now have a better understanding why I prefer some articles compared to other that I read in health, fitness, and running magazine. The most enjoyable articles are the most organized ones; they possess an air of professionalism and authority, without being stuffy. I’ve noticed many of the articles that flow with ease, have clarity, and follow a Kolb-esque format. The articles have the ability to hold an expert’s interest while engaging a recreational enthusiast. That’s exactly the type of writer I want to be. J

Thinking about why it’s great writing ELPs, made me realize, the discomfort the process brought in the beginning, is now beginning to bring me almost as much enjoyment as a really great workout:

Starting the process is the hardest part, getting down to business and writing is a test of confidence, strength, and endurance, I don’t exactly enjoy doing it, but I’ve felt a deep sense of pride and satisfaction each time I’ve completed one. J

“Hard work, a little discomfort, humbling realizations of weakness...Must remember it will all be worth it. Move your body, exercise your mind, challenge yourself and thank the people who support you.”

-Melissa Adylia Calasanz

J

-Melissa Adylia Calasanz

-Melissa Adylia Guteirrez

Learning Process Paper from PPA LEAP100 Course

"The Process" can be a Rabid Monster!

10/10/11

Everyone has weaknesses; finishing the last ELP was mine. Or so I thought. What the heck is my problem?! “Trust the Process…” My A**!

The process mocked me! It tormented me! It was a nightmare! I obsessed over it! It was more personally humiliating than crying in class. Really?...

"The Process"

; )

The moment I sent ELP #1, the obsessing began again.

I thought I had given myself permission to send “ten pages of crap” after I spent over six hours thinking “I just couldn’t make it come together.” I was obsessing about clarity, credibility, and the peer review. However, my obsessing was more a symptom of something much deeper. Anger! Frustration! Helplessness! Something I didn’t realize till we were reviewing my paper in class. I was trying to control a paper that really didn’t need any strong-arming, because I am losing control.

I spend so much of my life taking care of other people’s bodies, with the care and consideration I give my own. I am the cheerleader, the motivator, the inspiration to so many people. No one sees my weaknesses. I refuse to show them to the public; why burden others when I am certain they have enough baggage to deal with too.  However, on Monday night’s I find myself an open book-basket case, crying for no reason.

Perhaps it’s the odd, intimate anonymity the PPA class provides that gives me the venue to be a blubbering mess. No one in the PPA class has any expectations of me, except for me. None of my peers know of my accomplishments, failures, hopes, or dreams. I am just that girl who sits in the same seat each week. It’s comforting, knowing that no one there expects anything of me. It’s liberating knowing I can just be human, weak…no one will judge me because they don’t care, but…I NEED someone to care! Not the students; I don’t need them to care about my papers, my education, my past, or my future. I need a doctor! A doctor who will give a shit about me the way I’ve cared about my clients. A health care practitioner who will follow up, show concern, check in and see how the tests are going or let me know any findings.

What does this have to do with class? Well, it was while reading my paper at the same time the others were reading it. I read it through their eyes: Unbiased, and without expectations. Halfway through reading it, I felt a bit of pride. That was a surprise! It felt good. I really do know my stuff, have tons of experience, and nothing but success with my clients. How great is that?! Well, it’s great, but then I began to feel sad…then mad.

I’m mad! No matter how well I have cared for my body, something is wrong and I can’t find a health care provider who gives a shit! The doctors are perplexed when they see me, send me off for more tests, but do they ever check in to see how I am? Do the show concern? Hell no! They don’t give a shit! And it pisses me off!

The bottom line is that the last class, the peer review, and the paper brought to my attention that I do know more than I know, I did a pretty good job of conveying information, and I’m excited to integrate the suggestions from peer review into my paper. The class also made me aware that one of the main reasons I am so successful is because I CARE! I care about each client that comes to me and trusts me with their time, their health, and their future physical well-being. I am frustrated with the lack of concern that well-paid, highly capable people in the health care industry are lacking in something I take great pride in: caring about the individuals that come to them.

Yep, it’s really not about the paper, but this paper is a part of my future…

-Melissa Adylia Calasanz

-Melissa Adylia Gutierrez

Learning Process Paper from PPA LEAP 100 Course